so, all these months of waiting, and it comes down to one word:
I have a very strong feeling of deja vu right now. of sitting here and typing this. but I don't think it was so hot how I remember. at 11 o'clock this morning it was an uncomfortable 94 degrees, and went up from there. how I wish I had a friend with a swimming pool! (at this point I'd even take the two separately -- a friend, and/or a swimming pool.)
ryan got his the-end package today. the-end in the sense that I can't afford to send any more, and at some point I won't send them even if I can afford to. it was a good package though, and I'm glad he enjoyed it.
work, bleh. it's all nonsense. although apparently lauren did something bad and lied to mick sr about it and was actually let go, she didn't just decide to leave; we had a meeting this afternoon where mick said that "one of our employees had an indiscretion last week, and was dishonest about it. I just want you all to know that that is grounds for immediate termination." he went on about how honesty is absolutely crucial to the company, and he will find out if we've been doing anything we oughtn't, and so on. at first I thought he was talking about someone who was in the meeting -- and I'm sitting there going, oh crap, what did I do?! but I guess he really was talking about lauren. nobody else left last week so it must have been her. I suppose he would've been sure about it before he fired her, but I wonder if lauren really did something as bad as he claims. I remember last wednesday -- the day she left -- he asked to see a copy of her spreadsheet, and the images she'd been indexing, and her times from the previous day. then he took all of that and had a long meeting with lauren and tim and after that was when lauren said she'd be leaving. it makes me so curious!!
not much else to add. I have passed the custard stage and now my heart feels like a giant cocoon where the (used-to-be) caterpillar is wriggling, squirming all over trying to get out. it's a nice combination of imagery between a fluttery thing and a nervous anxious can't-sit-still something-wonderful-is-about-to-happen feeling. yes I'm awesome.